Friday, March 12, 2010

I Didn't Know That

I didn’t know Elton John says Jesus was gay.

I didn’t know Glenn Beck is a Mormon.

I didn’t know some Greeks can retire with a full pension at age 50.

I didn’t know that the body of Cyprus’ ex-President, which was stolen, has been found. I’m ashamed to admit that I didn’t even know it had been stolen in the first place.

I didn’t know it was illegal for Christians to proselytize in Morocco.

I didn’t know that if you need an organ transplant in Israel you get preferential treatment if you’ve agreed to donate an organ. Not the one you need I assume.

Speaking of donations, I didn’t know that part of Obama’s Nobel Peace Prize money, all of which is being donated to charity, will go to the American Indian College Fund.

I didn’t know that a federal appeals court has ruled that “One nation, under God” in the Pledge of Allegiance does not violate the separation of church and state because it is a patriotic exercise, not a religious activity. I guess burning a cross on someone’s front lawn would be classified as free speech.

More on donations. I didn’t know that a sporting club (anyone know what a sporting club is?) is donating $10,000 to children’s charities as part of a plea deal to atone for the death of an 8-year-old boy who shot and killed himself with an Uzi at a gun fair sponsored by the club. How generous of them.

I didn’t know that statisticians are predicting U.S. births to Asian, black and Hispanic women will surpass births to non-Hispanic whites this year. More evidence that the precious white majority is on the way out. Get used to it people.

I didn’t know that in Germany in recent weeks there have been 153 claims of sexual abuse in Catholic schools, some dating back decades, some only a few years ago. The Pope says he’ll look into it.

I didn’t know that Dysport, an anti-wrinkle competitor of Botox, is offering new customers a rebate if they’re not happy with their wrinkle situation after trying Dysport. The rebate? A Botox treatment. Let’s see if I’ve got this right. If I get injected with Dysport and a look in the mirror shows my eyelids are droopy, my eyebrows are uneven, and I’ve got Mother Teresa-like furrows, I can do it all over again – free – with Botox. Sure I will.

Have a nice day!

1 Comments:

Anonymous NICK TRAINO said...

DAN, I COULD NOT RESIST THIS COMMENT.
I TAKE THIS ARTICLE TO ASSUME THAT YOU NOW KNOW THAT YOU DON'T QUALIFY AS A "KNOW IT ALL PERSON",AND THEREFORE YOU ARE IN THE MINORITY.
JUST HAVING A LITTLE FUN, DAN.
NICK

8:42 AM  

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