Hermie!

Hermie, Hermie, Hermie.

You’ve been a bad boy, Hermie. Naughty, naughty. What the heck, though. Boys will be boys, right?

Your outraged, repeated denials are kind of cute. Nobody believes you, of course, even those diehard fans who think it’s a fabricated story created by lefties and their flunkies who control the press. Well, that’s not quite accurate. Mrs. Hermie believes you. Her hubby wouldn’t behave that way. No, Sirree. Not my Hermie.

There’s no way you’re gonna change your story. And that’s good. More ladies will come forth with lies about you. The stories will become more graphic. Doesn’t matter. You’ve done nothing wrong. Never have. Never will.

Well, good for you. For those of us who don’t care about you and your past (or your present) it’s a welcome diversion from the boredom of watching Mittie move on inexorably to his nomination. Now if some ladies from Mitt’s past would come forth with some goodies, that would be interesting. Fuggett it. Ain’t gonna happen.